Funny Shirt Categories

Coffee Is For Closers: Glengarry Glen Ross T-shirt

A funny t-shirt inspired by the movie, Glengarry Glen Ross. The real estate sales company big-wig Blake, played by Alec Baldwin delivers this classic line:

Put. That coffee. Down.
COFFEE IS FOR CLOSERS!

And that's what's written on this t-shirt, in a sort of coffee-colored lettering, along with a pic of a steaming cup of coffee. Which implies, that the wearer of the shirt is also a closer. i.e. a winner, a success, a manly man. Are you a closer?

Comes in an assortment of manly colors and sizes. But girly girls can wear it too and get irony bonus points.

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Subliminal Eye Chart T-shirt

Have you been to the eye doctor lately? How's your vision? How about your paranoia-vision? Test your friends' (and potential friends') vision with this cool eye-chart t-shirt. In fact, challenge everyone you meet to take the eye/paranoia test. As the famous saying goes, "Just because you're paranoid doesn't mean they're not out to get you."

This t-shirt is laid out like a typical vision test chart, but the letters spell out those immortal words of wisdom,

EVERYONE IS OUT TO GET YOU

Some of the letters are coloured red rather than the standard black for some reason. It must be part of their plan - secret meanings, hidden messages are everywhere. Or maybe it just looks better that way.

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Weird Works For Me: House M.D. T-shirt

I tried normal, and it didn't work. So recently, I've been experimenting with weird. And strangely enough, weird works for me. Normally, I don't have much in common with Dr. House, though I am a fan of the show. But, weird as it is, weirdness is our shared "secret for success."

I think I've beaten that little joke to within an inch of its life, so now I'll describe this great House MD shirt. Just off center to the left (from the wearer's perspective) is a photo of Hugh Laurie as Dr. House, looking slightly deranged as usual. His face is half hidden by an intravenous bottle that hangs from one of those metal stands. To the right of that, in 4 different mismatched serif fonts (one for each word) is the line:

WEIRD
WORKS
FOR ME

...and, as with all the official House shirts, there's a House MD logo discreetly place at the bottom. Tastefully weird.

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Da Vinci Rock Man T-shirt

Everybody know that Leonardo rocks. No. Not that Leonardo. I mean, of course Leonardo da Vinci. Artist, scientist, inventor, celebrity chef, and a man with undeniably awesome hair.

Well, I'd now like to introduce you to a tribute tee to the great man and his massive contributions to mankind. The Da Vinci Rocks Out t-shirt. It features the iconic da Vinci anatomical diagram man, rocking out Pete Townsend style on his guitar.

A must have for any aspiring renaissance rock man or woman!

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Back By Popular Demand T-shirt

This funny t-shirt is back by popular demand. You can tell, because that's what it says right on the front of the shirt. White text on black:

BACK BY POPULAR DEMAND!

No, it does not say "Leaving by popular demand" on the back! That would be mean.

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Noah's Dilemma T-shirt

Fake science has proven beyond that shadow of a dunce that dinosaurs roamed the earth (or at least the part of the earth near Altoona, Kansas - God's Country!) along with humans about 6,000 years ago. Proven by whom, you ask? By a group called "Creationists in Lab-coats". And we all know that if you're wearing a lab coat, you're doing SCIENCE. So, anyway, these dudes found caveman drawings in this little town in the bible belt that prove that dinosaurs marched two-by-two, alongwith all the other animals, onto Noah's Ark.

To commemorate this stupendous scientific achievement, I will proudly wear my new, "Noah's Dilemma" t-shirt whenever I visit my local creationist museum. Like Noah said when he noticed a pair of 35ft, 7 ton tyrannosauruses lined up patiently to get on his dinky little wooden boat,

DAMN.

You said it, Noah. You said it.

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Circle of Trust - Meet the Parents T-shirt

Meet the Parents was a pretty dumb movie, I gotta say. But I did like a couple of bits, like where Robert DeNiro's character (former CIA agent or some other kind of top secret spy dude) was talking about his circle of trust, and drawing diagrams to explain it.

In the diagram featured on this t-shirt, he has sketched out an explanation for his daughter's boyfriend, Focker, telling him just where he fits (or doesn't fit, rather) into the family's circle of trust. I've never worked for the CIA (I swear!), but I am not inclined to give the benefit of the doubt to people I don't know well. So I wear this t-shirt to let pretty much everybody I meet know exactly how I feel about them, trust-wise. Always better to let them know where they stand, don't you think?

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Black Tuxedo T-shirt

This is, I believe the most formal of the tuxedo t-shirts we've found so far. A look that says,

I may be a t-shirt-wearing slob, but I am The Master of Ceremonies so sit down and SFTU!

Not suited for funerals. The shirt-front is pleated (classy!) rather that ruffled (kitchy). A red rose in the lapel add a touch of romantic flair. The dapper matching red bow tie and red shirt buttons give it some flash. I chose the black.

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Pink Freud Funny T-shirt

Man, I loved Dark Side Of The Moon. Does that mean my id is under-developed, or that I want to kill my father? You should ask Sigmund Freud - except he's dead. If he'd been alive at the same time, I'm sure he would have had something to say about Pink Floyd.

The Pink Freud t-shirt features a great pic of the great man himself. And he's pink. Therefore, Pink Freud. There's also something suggestive hidden in the smoke from his cigar. If you can see it, you're probably a pervert. If it reminds you of your mother, please don't buy this shirt.

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Paddle Faster I Hear Banjos T-Shirt

Ah, the great outdoors... Paddling peacefully down the river through pristine wilderness. No sound but the gentle lapping of water, birdsong, and hey! What was that?!? Did you just hear what I just heard? HOLY CRAPOLA!

paddle faster
I hear banjos

This one is a great gift for the outdoorsey types in your life. Or anyone old enough to remember the movie, Deliverance, with its ominous use of the bluegrass classic, Dueling Banjos.

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You'z at The Funny T-shirt House

We're always on the look-out for the latest, funniest tshirt designs to add to our own collections. Funnytshirthouse.com is where we share our favorite funny tees with the world. If you're into wearing clothes that reflect your sense of humour then have a look around. We hope you find something that puts a smile on your face. If you find a funny shirt that you like and want to get one for yourself, we can direct you to the seller. They're all established online shops -each with a solid reputation for customer service and quality.

Why do I wear funny t-shirts?

  • A funny or provocative t-shirt can be a great conversation starter.
  • I can display my sharp wit without opening my mouth and ruining the effect.
  • Funny t-shirts spread joy and cheer throughout the land.
  • I amuse myself when I look in the mirror (and practice reading reversed text)
So there you have it. Great funny t-shirts and great rationalizations for buying them. Full service with a sardonic smile from FunnyTshirtHouse.com. Enjoy!